This is a public forum, Marco, and I appreciate that some of us might feel shy about exposing themselves to criticism from people who are not fair minded, and that has happened to me here on this forum, and no one defended me nor do I expect that. I defended myself.
I have had a few such encounters of the unsavory kind myself. And I also know from bitter experience that the first person starts with you. No one is going to do it for you or on your behalf. If that’s too scary for you then stay home and redecorate your apartment. I have really had it with people tell me to tone it down so other people who dont speak up can feel comfortable. Communication is not a risk free experience. If you can’t cross over into a public space and get your ideas across then accept that others will do so. And maybe you need to work on that. And acting ‘as if’ is a very good way to start.
I would prefer you don’t tone it down, John! I love you and all your weirdness. Nor am I interested in being a victim’s advocate. I am especially not interested in zero-sum café games! I want people to speak up for themselves; it’s just that I don’t want them to be confused by our set-up, or have a lot of difficulty finding their way in. I want high quality spaces for everybody who sincerely wants be here (in the Café zone). I don’t mind being a little more accomodating, if it serves the overall space.
If I were literally running a café I would be paying attention to poetics of space—the varying ways of welcoming clientele with different tastes, needs, and preferences. For example, I would be sure to have a few quiet corners for intimate conversation. I would also want a couple more open, brightly lit areas for business meetings and group discussions. I’d certainly have a stage for open mic nights and performances. In addition: the menu, music, and decor would all be on my mind.
And if I was a customer of such an establishment, I would probably make use of all these spaces at different times, in different moods. What kind of space within the meta-space would you like to create? How could I help (if I can)? I feel that we’ve opened up a lot of possibilities in last few months. I’m open to alternative ways of knowing, thinking, being…what would you like to have happen?
@johnnydavis54 if you’re referring to my comment that I don’t watch the youtube edited broadcasts, it’s not b/c of intimidation; but b/c of my preference for “real” spontaneous interaction, albeit the public broadcast of “intimate” conversation may intimidate some. There is a human characteristic called “self-monitoring”; like introversion/extraversion, it’s a personality trait - some people are high, some low, some in the middle, and so on and so forth. I score low in that trait, which can get me in trouble. No doubt I might benefit from an “actor’s studio” workshop. Just not my “style.” And, but maybe - ‘the times they are a changing’. Now, everyone’s on stage all the time, whether they like it not, and one would be well served to be prepared for that. “Life’s a campaign”, now more than ever. gotta go - cafe’s open.
(where is the Buddhist smirk emoji)