Mindful Sex and Human Development [CCafe 7/3]


(Durwin Foster) #27

you were the only one yesterday, who felt the need to interrupt Terri O’Fallon, btw. Wilber’s an army brat too, btw. You might have a good conversation :slight_smile:

(Ed Mahood) #28

First of all, I would like to thank all of you who weighed in on this. I had started out thinking that I was the only one who had uncertainties about the subject, and I am relieved to find that I am not alone.

The quintessence of what I’ve read (and you can correct me if I’m wrong) is that the whole subject is in flux (and I must add, much more flux in the, say, roughly, Anglo-American world than here on the Continent, for example), so I, like everyone, else will have to sort it out on my own, to the degree it is necessary for the environment in which I find myself. I’m fine with that.

Nevertheless, I must admit, I’ve learned a lot.

(Durwin Foster) #31

I would have appreciated it if you would have stopped right there, rather than continuing with your gender essentialism, Johnny.

(LaughingCryingDancing) #32

Durwin with due respect to your comment in regards to Johnny’s observation,I find it spot on,speaking as a heterosexual male interacting with the groups he speaks about in his experience.I have dealt with these conditions in the sense of enlarging my personal experience & found the tension of difference to cut both ways.Having a Daughter which finally expressed her having a fluid sexual identity ,was a precious moment,she has not been able share this with her mother( we’re divorced) .This is to say " a Good Wrestling Tango" involves a willingness to engage the dance for learning,fun & dare I love of the DANCE?

(Durwin Foster) #34

that’s fine, Michael. I was stating my opinion, and stand by it. Glad to hear about a positive outworking with your daughter :slight_smile:

(Durwin Foster) #35

I have been one of the damned too. Thus my invitation in pm to connect. I am learning not to avoid conflict. I notice that you elevate most things I say into the realm of “high conflict”, which in my view, is a projection on your part. Yes, damned if you do, damned if you don’t. I can resonate with that.

(Durwin Foster) #37

well, it’s true there is a kind of audit trail :slight_smile:

(Geoffrey Edwards) #42

I was going to say, before @DurwinFoster’s comment turned the dialogue into a different direction, that I consider these remarks, @johnnydavis54, to be among the most important I have seen in a long time concerning this issue. I agree that the idea of masculinity is changing, and for once in a good direction. On re-reading Durwin’s message and Johnny’s original text, I noticed that you (@johnnydavis54) did “project” a few ideas about the states of mind of straight men that were more caricature than real, but we are among friends here, and I let it slide. I wouldn’t have labelled it “gender essentialism” - in fact, I try to avoid labels altogether, especially when talking about friends (or anyone I know). Even if my inferences are wrong, it is all too easy to slide down the slippery slope into some form of “flaming” in a forum - we need to be careful what we say and how we say it, IMHO.

(Durwin Foster) #45

Both straight and gay dads perfectly fine raising girls!